Chainstore Massacre 2016: Aftermath
There were no long speeches or motivational talks. No leaderboards or podiums. No screaming fans or TV cameras. This was the Massacre: egos were checked at the door as people committed themselves to the set of unknown challenges that awaited them.
The 2016 London Chainstore Massacre took place on a mist-covered Sunday in East London, perfect weather for the Halloween weekend adding an almost mythical element to what has become known as the city’s ultimate test of functional fitness and of mental and physical resilience.
The rules, as ever, were simple. Start the day with three lives each. Face a series of challenges devised by the Mass Murderers of PKGen – this year Chris ‘Blane’ Rowat, Kevin ‘Silent Assassin’ Francomme, Andy ‘Lone Traceur’ Pearson and Chris ‘Beastly’ Keighley, ably supported by Shirley ‘Shirtrix’ Darlington-Rowat and Hector ‘Death to All’ Hurmuz-Sklias. Fail to complete a challenge, lose a life. Survive to the end of the day and receive the coveted Survivor Hoody.
Many stepped through the doors of the Chainstore Gym yesterday. Just four survived. A special mention goes to them: Mark Stacey, Neil Keighley, Luis Nunez Marti and Philip Mace. Incredible effort.
But everyone succeeded. Simply by showing up for such a challenge, by stepping into the arena of the unknown for no other reason than to put body and mind to the test and gain that most precious of substances – self-knowledge – and by giving it their very best, every single one of those individuals earned our respect. Many came close to surviving, falling at the last hurdle by sometimes just one or two seconds (Will!), and that’s a mighty achievement in itself. Enduring 9 hours of consecutive, relentless physical/mental challenges is no mean feat.
We believe the only true way to know your training is working is to put it to the test, regularly. Parkour prizes adaptive capabilities above all; being able to deal with any obstacle or adversity that comes your way, finding solutions, overcoming challenges, persisting, enduring… and in so doing, discovering more about yourself as an athlete and as a human being. We think everyone who took part this weekend did all that and more. They ran, jumped, climbed, crawled, carried, lifted, rowed, balanced and moved all day. And whether they survived or not, they all succeeded.
We’d like to thank everyone who made the Massacre such a kick-ass event again, including the coaches for the day, event sponsors Aqua Coco, the logistical support and production team, and most importantly all the participants! And keep your eyes peeled for the official film of the event coming very soon…
The next UK event is the legendary Winterval Parkour Day, Sunday January 8th, to kick-start the new training year: keep an eye on the site over the next few days for booking details and event info, and get it in the diary now!